Voices from Russia

Tuesday, 5 February 2019

An Overhyped Bore: Five Reasons Why Superbowl Sunday Sucks

Filed under: sport,USA — 01varvara @ 00.00
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On Sunday, the 53rd Superbowl takes place with the New England Patriots taking on the Los Angeles Rams. Sputnik’s Chris Summers explains why he believes it is one of the most over-rated sports events in the world.


So, the Boston-based Patriots go head to head with the Rams on Sunday, 3 February. Big deal. Superbowl Sunday is just a bore, am I right? So, let me list my problems with it.

  1. The Sport Itself

The most popular sport in the entire world… with the possible exception of India… is football. Not American football but Association Football (to give it its technical name), or, as the Yanks call it, soccer. That’s because it’s a much more exciting game, with far more variety and skill. Basically, gridiron (as it’s sometimes called) is the same free kick performed over and over. Tedious beyond belief. Not surprising then that American football, as played in the National Football League (NFL), is popular in how many countries? Er, one. Possibly two, if you count Canada, although they’re far more interested in ice hockey. Walter Camp, a Yale graduate considered the “Father of American Football”, adopted the game from the rules of rugby, which is also a far superior game. More on that later.

  1. The Players

In every Hollywood movie set in a high school, the girls swoon over the football players, the “jocks” who swagger around the high school with a surplus of testosterone and an absence of brainpower. The adoration of football players in the USA continues through “college”… where extremely dumb people can get a university education by virtue of their sporting prowess. So what attributes do you need to succeed in the sport? Good fitness levels, an ability to withstand frequent headaches, and (only if you are running back) some athletic ability and speed. For that, they get paid astronomical sums. The Patriots’ star player, Tom Brady, was given a contract extension in March 2018, which included a 28 million USD signing bonus. He’s currently worth 44 million USD and he earns millions from endorsements with Under Armour and UGG boots. How many games do they play? Sixteen. There are 16 games in a regular NFL season. That compares to around 38 games in an English Premier League season and 162 for Major League Baseball players.

  1. The Stupid Outfits

NFL players have been wearing the same stupid garb since the 1930s… giant helmets and shoulder pads. Why? The game’s no more dangerous than rugby union, rugby league, Aussie rules football, or Gaelic football and none of those guys wear battlefield outfits. So basically, yeah, I’m saying NFL players are pussies who wouldn’t last five minutes in a man’s game like rugby.

  1. The Fans

Unlike football (soccer) fans, NFL fans very rarely travel to away games. Therefore, the crowd will be 100 percent home fans, which leads to an extraordinary lack of tension or atmosphere. The Superbowl is the exception because they play it in a neutral venue (in this case, Atlanta) and both sets of fans will be there. Even then, they just sit and watch, literally spectate. There’s no singing or chanting, let alone animosity. Compare that to the FA Cup Final or one of the big derbies in world footballRiver Plate versus Boca Juniors, Rangers against Celtic, Fenerbahce v Galatasaray, or Olympiakos v Panathinaikos. Chalk and cheese.

  1. The Superbowl Hype

From Christmas until the date of the Superbowl, the US media will be full of nothing but this pointless little game. I guess we can be grateful they don’t give it a name like the World Series, and pretend the whole of the globe are genuinely interested in it. However, the NFL is determined to expand overseas. They’re already playing games in London and broadcasting to other countries. We aren’t interested. Go away. Then, there’s the advertising. Basically, the Superbowl is just one giant excuse to sell advertising. Every year, billions of dollars is spent on Superbowl-related advertising. This year, fans of the cult movie The Big Lebowski got excited when Jeff Bridges, as The Dude, appeared in a teaser. However, a few days later, it turned out there was no Big Lebowski sequel, only an ad for Stella Artois beer.

3 February 2019

Chris Summers

Sputnik International



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